funny sayings

A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running.

A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me, I'm afraid of widths.

All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt.

Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot.

Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before.

California is a fine place to live - if you happen to be an

What if nothing exists and we're all in somebody's dream? Or what's worse, what if only that fat guy in the third row exists?

I want to tell you a terrific story about oral contraception. I asked this girl to sleep with me and she said 'No'.


I'm not afraid of dying, I just don't want to be there when it happens.

Marriage is an institution, but who wants to live in an institution?