funny sayings

• Make all the answers 'true', and all the students lose their minds.
• Did you know? An average four-year old child asks 437 questions a day.
• Freshman year: I'm going to have a 4.0; Senior year: C's get degrees.
• No matter how big and bad you are, when a two year old hands you a toy phone. You answer it.
• I want to headbang, but I wear glasse

Well, it is July, and it is HOT. Here is some funny sayings I collected :

• Some people say "If you can't beat them, join them". I say "If you can't beat them, beat them", because they will be expecting you to join them, so you will have the element of surprise.
• You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice.
• Never get

===========================funny friend sayings========

You're a 24-year old man who wants to keep his 66-year old girlfriend from leaving.

Do you C) slam the door on her hand,
hit her on the head with pillows,
twist her nose,
and force her to kiss a picture of her dead husband?

===========================funny friend sayings========

We can now add "Doctors start to fight" to

I believe in making the world safe for our children, but not our children's children, because I don't think children should be having sex.

Nobody can get the truth out of me because even I don't know what it is. I keep myself in a constant state of utter confusion.

Whatever is not nailed down is mine. What I can pry loose is not nailed down.

Sometimes I think you have to march right i

Everybody wants to go to heaven, but nobody wants to die.

Never argue with an idiot. They drag you down to their level.

Mothers of teens know why some animals eat their young.

You spend the first 2 years of their life teaching
them to walk and talk. Then you spend the next 16 years telling them to sit down and shut-up.


There is only one pretty child in the world... and every mother

My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She's ninety-seven now, and we don't know where the hell she is.

Never have more children than you have car windows.

If God wanted us to bend over he'd put diamonds on the floor.

If two wrongs don't make a right, try three.

Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.

Most women set out to try

Before I was married, I had a hundred theories about raising children and no children. Now, I have three children and no theories.

I’ve got seven kids, the three words you hear most around my house are: "Hello, goodbye, and I’m pregnant"


Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth.

There's nothing that can help you understand your beliefs more than trying to explain them