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funny work sayings 2010 05 26 p1


I dream for a living.


Working gets in the way of living.


The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources.

It’s just a job. Grass grows, birds fly, waves pound the sand. I beat people up.

The process of maturing is an art to be learned, an effort to be sustained. By the age of fifty you have made yourself what you are, and if it is good, it is better than your youth.

funny work sayings 2010 05 26 p2


The harder I work the luckier I get.

Work is the curse of the drinking classes.


To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.

If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.

E-mail is not to be used to pass on information or data. It should be used only for company business. (Accounting Mgr., Electric Boat Company)

funny work sayings 2010 05 26 p3


What do hookers do on their nights off type?

An ant on the move does more than a dozing ox.



No project was ever completed on time and within budget.

The reward for work well done is the opportunity to do more.

You moon the wrong person at an office party and suddenly you’re not ‘professional’ any more.

By working faithfully eight hours a day, you may get to be a boss and work

funny work sayings 2010 05 26 p4


Work fascinates me, I can look at it for hours!

Hard work is damn near as overrated as monogamy.


The world is divided into people who do things and people who get the credit.



There ought to be a better way to start the day than by getting up in the morning.

Every individual has a place to fill in the world and is important in some respect whether he chooses to be so or not.

funny work sayings 2010 05 26 p5


I only go to work on days that don’t end in a ‘y’.

Satisfaction Guaranteed or Double Your Garbage Back.


The Romans didn’t find algebra very challenging, because X was always 10.

I always arrive late at the office, but I make up for it by leaving early.



Quote from the boss: "Teamwork is a lot of people doing what 'I' say." (Mktg. executive, Citrix Corporation)

My sister pas

funny work sayings 2010 05 26 p6


A professor is one who talks in someone else’s sleep.

Hard work never killed anybody, but why take a chance?


I am a friend of the workingman, I would rather be his friend than be one.

If hard work is the key to success, most people would rather pick the lock.


Be always sure you're right, then go ahead.


What holy cities are to nomadic tribes - a symbol of race and a b

funny work sayings 2010 05 26 p7


Sorry yesterday was the deadline for all complaints.

People are always available for work in the past tense.

Ambition is a poor excuse for not having sense enough to be lazy.

I wish my brother would learn a trade, so I would know what kind of work he’s out of.

What I need is a list of specific unknown problems we will encounter. (Lykes Lines Shipping)

How long is this Beta guy g

funny work sayings 2010 05 26 p8


The world is full of willing people; some willing to work, the rest willing to let them.

I didn’t say it was your fault. I said I was going to blame it on you.

Thinking is the hardest work there is, which is the probable reason why so few engage in it.

Kids spell love T-I-M-E.


The scientist is not a person who gives the right answers, he's one who asks the right questions.

funny work sayings 2010 05 26 p9

My father taught me to work; he did not teach me to love it.

If it weren’t for the last minute, nothing would get done.

If work is so terrific, why do they have to pay you to do it?


We recently received a memo from senior management saying, This is to inform you that a memo will be issued today regarding the subject mentioned above." (Microsoft, Legal Affairs Division)

One day my b

funny work sayings 2010 05 26 p10

Early to bed and early to rise probably indicates unskilled labor.

I like work; it fascinates me. I can sit and look at it for hours.


The remaining work to finish in order to reach your goal increases as the deadline approaches.

The trouble with unemployment is that the minute you wake up in the morning you’re on the job.

A bone to the dog is not charity. Charity is the bone shar

funny work sayings 2010 05 26 p11


Doing nothing is very hard to do…you never know when you’re finished.

All I’ve ever wanted was an honest week’s pay for an honest day’s work.



I make a lot of money, but I don’t want to talk about that. I work very hard and I’m worth every cent.

People are still willing to do an honest day’s work. The trouble is they want a week’s pay for it.

God put me on this Earth to accomplis

funny work sayings 2010 05 26 p12



I didn’t have to work till I was three. But after that, I never stopped.

Be nice to people on your way up because you meet them on your way down.

If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame.

Doing it right is no excuse for not meeting the schedule. No one will believe you solved this problem in one day! We've been working on it for months. Now, go act bus


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