funny sayings

Here is some funny sex sayings which I enjoy a lot.

• Sex education may be a good idea in the schools, but I don't believe the kids should be given homework.
• Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope.
• My wife is a sex object - every time I ask for sex, she objects.
• Sex... the pleasure is momentary, the position ridiculous, and the expen

• If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the Up button.
• A man in love is incomplete until he has married. Then he's finished.
• Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer but wish we didn't.
• When I die, I want to die like my grandfather who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his bus.
• Did

The following is a collection of funny sayings about book which I enjoy a lot.

• Thank you for sending me a copy of your book - I'll waste no time reading it.
• Never lend books, for no one ever returns them. The only books I have in my library are books that other folks have leant me.
• I just got out of the hospital. I was in a speed-reading accident. I hit a b

• Accomplishing the impossible only means that the boss will add it to your regular duties.
• A clean desk is a sign of a cluttered desk drawer.
• Do not underestimate your abilities. That is your boss's job.
• Employer: "I'm looking for a part time Girl-Friday. Are you interested?" Applicant: "No, thanks. I'm all girl seven days a week!"
• If w

The following is a collection of funny sayings about april fool which I enjoy a lot. Hope you find them funny.

• You can fool all the people some of the time, and some of the people all the time, but you cannot fool all the people all the time.
• Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else.
• On 2012-03-31 if anyone praises you for

• If you trust Google more than your doctor then maybe it's time to switch doctors.
• Whiskey is by far the most popular of all remedies that won't cure a cold.
• The doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me.
• Doctors are the same as lawyers; the only difference is that lawyers merely rob you, whereas doctors rob you an

• In the spring, I have counted 136 different kinds of weather inside of 24 hours.
• Spring is nature's way of saying, "Let's party!"
• One swallow does not make a spring, nor does one fine day.
• The day the Lord created hope was probably the same day he created Spring.
• Spring is when you feel like whistling even with a shoe full of slush.

The following is a collection of funny facebook status which I enjoy a lot.

• Some relationships are like Tom & Jerry. They tease each other, knock down each other irritate each other but can’t live without each other.
• The biggest lie I tell myself is... "I don’t need to write that down, I’ll remember it."
• I wish real life was like the cartoons, I could w

The following is a collection of funny facebook status which I enjoy a lot. Hope you find them funny.

• Life is not fair, but life is not fair for everyone... which actually makes it fair.
• You have the capacity to learn from your mistakes. You will learn a lot today.
• I want to make a Facebook account and the name will be Nobody so when I see stupid crap peo

• Cop: "When is your birthday?" Drunk Teen: "September 25." Cop: "What year?" Drunk Teen: "Every year!"
• It is really rude to talk while I'm interrupting.
• "I wasn't that drunk!" "Dude, you asked your mom if she had kids.."
• A recent study shows that 90% of women don't like men in pink shirts. Ironically, 90% of men in pink shirts don't like wo

The following is a collection of funny big bang theory sayings which I enjoy a lot. Hope you find them funny.

• Amy: I find the notion of romantic love an unnecessary cultural construct that adds no value to human relationships.
• Penny: Another night? I guess your could try... but deep inside your heart you'll know that laundry night is always Saturday night.

The following is a collection of funny big bang theory sayings which I enjoy a lot. Hope you find them funny.

• Sheldon: The entrance to the dungeon is a moss covered door. You manage to open it only to find yourself face-to-face with a hideous, foul-smelling, moss-covered ogre. What do you do? Howard: I say, "Hey Ma, what's for dinner?"
• Penny: Mrs Cooper? Hey,